For this throwback I want to talk about an interesting encounter I had a while ago on a flight back to Oahu. This encounter I had was a “right place at the right time” moment but really highlights the importance of seizing any opportunity that is presented to you as well as how crucial texting game is when it comes time to move forward with a girl. Ultimately it is a story of failure, but we often find valuable lessons in our failures.
My connecting flight had landed in Dallas. After a few hours of stretching my legs and meeting a few interesting patrons of one of the airport bars, I found myself seated on my next flight to Hawaii. I was in a generally good mood due to my recent conversations and ready to settle in to a 8+ hour flight. I took my seat and crossed my fingers for an empty row. After some time I see a cute Hispanic girl take her seat next to me leaving the middle seat between us open. She had a nerdy look with big glasses, skinny but was wearing a low cut top revealing a nice rack. HB7 I’d say. I gave her a quick smile and she reciprocated. Nothing really as far as an IOI but it wasn’t cold. I wondered if I would be fortunate enough to have the seat between us remain open and lo and behold it did.
Once we began to taxi to the runway I opened casually with “Looks like we got lucky” and gestured towards the open seat between us. She responded positively and we began to chat about our advantage in legroom and dogging the “fat-guy-in-the-middle” bullet. Although the initial conversation was warm, she mentioned that she may still change seats to sit with her sister and her sister’s boyfriend as they also had a seat vacant in their row. I don’t think it was a shit test tbh but I agreed and amplified by saying that if she were to leave I’d have the row all to myself. We kept up our little chat and I found out she is a college student visiting Hawaii for the first time and would be in Waikiki for a week. She perked up even more when she discovered I am a local and knew my way around.
By the time we were up in the air our initial conversation had faded but she made a show of taking out all her stuff and settling in. I mostly amuse myself on my phone and occasionally take a sideways glance when I see her checking me out. The attraction was most definitely there. Eventually we went back into conversation mode and ran through a lot of typical first date “get to know you” topics such as hobbies, music, work, etc. I give her some advice on cool places in Hawaii to check out as well as nightlife recommendations. She seems enthusiastic and we do some light flirting.
At some point I decide to watch a movie that I have downloaded on my phone. I offer her the right ear to my wireless ear buds and ask if she would like to join me. She agrees and we settle in to what turns into two movies, one horror and one comedy. Easy kino and light conversation throughout. Personally I wasn’t a big fan of either movies but they made for fun conversation at least. She rests her hand on my thigh at one point and it really turns me on.
After that we chat a bit about her plans again and we exchange phone numbers and agree to arrange a meetup in the future. After I take her number I tell her I am going to take a nap. She pulls out a book and begins to read. I do my best man-spread (take that feminists) and tilt my hat down a bit to where the light is blocked but I can still see her legs. Now, call me a pervert if you wish, but I couldn’t help but watch her occasionally from under my hat. By this time we had some solid kino and there was a good bit of sexual tension. Between resting my eyes, I notice after a little while she begins to squeeze her thighs together and shift around a bit as if she is uncomfortable. I pretend not to notice. Eventually she gets up to use the restroom. OK… so it is entirely possible she just had to pee or is reading a really good book but I doubt that 😉 . Eventually she returns and seems to be more composed. I nod off.
Eventually we land. We chat a bit more when departing the plane and we make our separate ways. Prior to this experience I had read a really good texting guide by Mr. V (Quick shout out to PUA Lee Cho for finding the original guide and re-posting it) but I had not completely internalized it yet. I was still more or less fine tuning my text game and was not 100% there yet.
The next day I shoot her an opening text and she replies immediately. Off to a good start. I invite her out that night but she has other plans with her sister. We chat a bit about tattoos and I roll off. I send her ping 3 days later to see what she is up to. Our text conversation goes well but she is acting very shit-testy… not in a bitchy way but in more of a “challenging” tone. It doesn’t phase me at all and I reflect that shit right back to her. Next thing I know there is heavy sexual innuendo back and forth and this is Fuck Up Number 1: Never come on too strong with the innuendo unless you are 100% sure of the lay. Also, Mr V’s guide states clearly not to become “texting buddies” with girls. Text exchange should be mostly logistics with a little bit of banter and THAT’S IT. So double fuck up I guess.
In my defense, I was familiar with Mystery’s “7 hour rule” and felt we had built up enough comfort together to warrant the sexual innuendo. Looking back I know this was a mistake but I really felt it was in the bag at this point. A few days later I shoot her an invite to Chinatown to check out a bar I’m fond of. She expresses interest but says “Let me get back to you on that”. She also mentioned that her sister and her sister’s boyfriend wants some privacy… perfect. We have some more back and forth innuendo and I tell her when I can pick her up and where else we will go… which leads me to Fuck Up Number 2: Keep some mystery around the evening’s activities and give her space to decide. Another double whammy. “Assuming the lay” is good for confidence but I completely neglected to allow her room to breathe as far as when and if I will pick her up and where we can go from there. It was my last evening free before she leaves Hawaii and I most likely came on too strong and/or needy. It was hard to tell I fucked up at first because our text exchange stayed playful but when it came time for her to respond to the time frame I gave her to meet… she ghosted.
So that was that. I recognize the fact that it is entirely possible that she had no intention of actually meeting up and simply enjoyed the attention I was giving her. I feel like if I assume that though, I am giving myself a pass and not being critical enough of my own game and where I might have gone wrong. These mistakes I made are open to interpretation and if you think there may be more to it or that I am wrong in my self assessment feel free to drop a comment. Either way, it was an interesting encounter and amusing to look back on. I don’t get to chat up cute girls on airplanes very often and ultimately it became the most enjoyable flight I’ve had. Perhaps there will be another cutie sitting next to me one day… as long it’s not a fat guy.